College? Responsibilities? Taxes???

I still don’t know what taxes are or how they work. I took economics senior year but we spent most of the class listening to the teacher talk because he’s just so darn hilarious. He didn’t mean to be funny most of the time, he’s just too much.

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Laganja Estranja on “Untucked”

Are we allowed to curse on blog posts? It’s my blog so I don’t see why not. This post will 100% be a stream of consciousness, like every thought I have will be written out. I should probably talk about college and responsibilities… College? Don’t know her. Responsibilities? Who? College is pretty funny though, I remember going on twitter and reading tweets that made it seem horrible and they’re so true. I haven’t slept well since August 22nd but it’s cool I guess, sleeping totally isn’t a basic human necessity. Anyway, hurricane Matthew just happened. I kept getting calls and texts from people saying “What did I ever do to you?” Like, HA HA I TOTALLY HAVEN’T HEARD THAT BEFORE. I honestly just started telling everyone “I hate your face, voice, and your very being. I would honestly prefer to drown you with my rapid winds and sea water than ever see your smug face ever again,” and they stopped. I think people don’t understand my humor is insult based and self-deprecating, but whatever not like I’m losing anything.

Yo. So I was in the shower thinking, because that’s what you do, and I was like: “Wow my taste in music is all over the place, I wonder what they all have in common…” And I stopped thinking because who does that? Thinking is just too much for me, I’d rather literally hear elevator music in my head than actually think. If I did Xanax I would totally just take like seven bars and hope I don’t die, but it would be totally worth it because you know why? I’d be doing nothing. I guess I’d be doing nothing besides hoping I don’t die but like the Grim Reaper doesn’t scare me.

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Regina Hall in “Scary Movie 3”

Death can straight up come @ me, as long as they don’t mess up my floor because I already don’t like cleaning it. I found some of my mom’s hair from last time she came to visit and I was about to call her and make her come pick up her mess, like I don’t know who she thinks I am. Cleaning up her mess and what not, but I also wanted her to come up and buy me groceries. I went to Publix and left with a gallon of pink lemonade and a pumpkin pie. I just had toast and pumpkin butter for dinner too. It’s obvious I don’t understand being an adult.

Anyway, music. I found this guy on Spotify and he falls under the genre of baile funk. I don’t even speak Portuguese but I’ll pretend like I do.

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I wish I could tell you where this is from.

I just had to look him up on Youtube to link him and G I R L, I’m jammin’. More people need to listen to music in different languages, like some of the stuff I hear are major #bops. Also we need to start paying respect to the old pop divas. Mariah Carey gets me T H E R E with her high notes, like what’s that wet spot? Couldn’t tell you. Old school Britney Spears? Yes gawd, but also listening to them is so nostalgic. They remind me of my little white self sitting in front of the television watching MTV trying to act grown.

Speaking of MTV, Tila Tequila. What happened to her? I hope she’s doing okay, I heard she returned to porn after retiring to  do her show. Her show honestly created a whole new generation that grew up being okay with bisexuality. Like, if you grow up with something, accepting it and learning that it’s a valid way of life then we aren’t a bunch of little buttholes being jerks to people. But for real, I hope she’s doing okay.

I just looked up old school MTV shows and I saw “The Ashlee Simpson Show” and she looked a lot like Katy Perry in the promo for the show. Who cares about Ashlee Simpson though, obviously her family doesn’t. I’m here for Katy Perry. One of the Boys was my jam. I didn’t fully understand how to work iTunes when I was younger and her album was the only thing on my iPod that was my music and not my brothers. Let. Me. Tell. You. To this day I can sing along to every song and not miss a beat or a word. I listened to that album so hard that I’m pretty sure I’m going to play every song at my funeral on repeat.

So, I got to 790 words and I’ve lost interest. C u l8r. (802)

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